Gift in present clothing

Ever heard this statement by someone whose long-term relationship just fell apart: "I gave him/her my all and yet this is where we ended up."?

When I hear it, I try very very hard to keep these 2 questions from rolling off the tip of my tongue;
1. Can you itemize your "my all" that you gave?
2. Did you at any point compare what you decided he/she needed versus what the person expressed he/she needed that you gave?

I think it is easy for us to give people what we decide they want. Giving someone we care about what he/she wants is not as easy.
If you disagree with my statement above, I'd love to hear why. I might learn a thing or two from you.